Mourning

Today, my friend died from a heart attack caused by a blood clot from his leg that was an injury from a car accident. My parents told me about my friends loss and when I contacted her, I found out more about it. Due to the fact that I'm in a different state than her, I'm unable to go to my friend's funeral, which has started taking it's toll on me. I'm anti social as it is and I consider myself a terrible friend because I suck at keeping in touch. Anyways, I met them back in 2009 with a few other people and we became friends around the same time, then my friends married each other, later in time, they both helped me through my trials with my ex boy friend. He mostly gave me tips but his wife, my other friend, also gave me tips, so I find myself having a hard time focusing after finding out my friend died when I thought he was recuperating from his injury. I'm writing this so that if I'm not on, it's because I'm trying to get my life in order and I plan on being back.